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xerinmichellexI nursed my vampire overdose by reading another vampire YA novel. This time it was Vampire Academy by Richelle Mead. Apart from being sick of the word "vampire" showing up in these titles, I've found another gripe:
5. Stop giving vampires mystic powers! I don't want to read another vampire who can see the future, control elements, heal people, hear the inner most thoughts of the girl their obsessed with. I know, I know, Dracula controlled some elements and he was besties with wolves and other lower level animals. That's fine because he didn't flaunt it. I'm so sick of vampires being "one with the Earth". They aren't suppose to be. Their the world's rejects--forced to live on the plane of existence by feeding off of life itself. That's enough for me. Quick reflexes, superhuman hearing, and impressive strength are okay. Just knock it off with the psychic abilities, please.
Vampire Academy wasn't that bad. Richelle Mead got me at the "forbidden love" nonsense. Don't look at me like that! It’s not between a mortal and vampire. I'm sorry, but nothing beats two people from not being together because their love would jeopardize their sacred duty of protecting her best friend. Nothing! I'm such a loser...
Also-also: The Vampire Diaries pilot < last night's episode. I'm still wavering between continual watching the show; and yet, if VD keeps up its slow rise of getting better, it might become a not-so guilty pleasure of mine. Lots of stuff went down, including character reversals, baaaaaad vampire shenanigans, and a renewed hope that producers actually know what their doing with the changes they've made.
Previous Episode
The episode begins with a section from the nifty guide, Horror Movie Cliches and the Writers Who Insist on Using Them: You know what's fun? Let's go set up a tent in the same woods where people are being attacked. Honey, what a wonderful idea! Though, I could do without the fog machine. I'm going to wear my new red shirt, isn't it cute on me? Yes, our dim-witted couple are eaten in a manner of minutes by Damon.
Seriously, Stefan, stop dreaming/voice-overing about how you and Elena complete each other and keep a tighter hold on Damon. For all we know, those aren't the only two people he eats tonight. Okay, afraid to admit it, but here I go: Poor Man's Robert Pattinson is growing on me. Like, he's really hot. Duh, I know, I'm complaining about the cliche above and I've fallen into the most overused one of all--vampires are sexy, yum! Whatever. The CW knows how to cast their leading men. Also, I think Paul Wesley lost some weight between the pilot and the actual start of filming the season. It might just be my imagine, but he seemed skinnier in this episode. /fangirl moment
Getting in a quick journal write down before school, Elena waxes that she's going to carpe diem today like her book self. I'm giving it until the second commercial break before she angst spews all over the place. Aww, Aunt Jenna's trying to be the responsible adult. My prediction hat is still on and it's telling me Jeremy's parent meeting isn't going to go all that well.
In History, Elena and Stefan make googly eyes and Mr. Tanner is still a jerk. The second mention of the upcoming and nameless comet appears. It's going to be important later down the episode road, aside from it being in the title.
Wuthering Heights makes its obligated cameo as Stefan loans Elena his first edition copy of it to her. I wish I was making it up and I wish I knew what point the scene was trying to make, other than me rolling my eyes and muttering, "Vampires and fucking Emily Bronte." Bonnie's Druid card has been revoked. Druids don't sound as cool as "single witch chicks" to Bonnie's Grams. I'm on change overload from last week's episode, I don't care anymore.
Rumble in the schoolyard! Jeremy attempts to play tough guy with Tyler about Vicki. See, Jeremy goes and visits Vicki before school. He braids her hair, whines about not having any parents, takes hits off of her morphine drip, and steals her Jell-o cups, all while she's asleep. Tyler...not so much. Jeremy calling him out on his shit is enduring--even when he threatens Tyler's life. I felt like giving J-boy a hug, because we all know where it's going to lead. Vicki's going to go right back to Tyler. We girls are so predictable.
In sly moves of his own, Stefan listens in on Elena and Matt's own conversation about Vicki. Matt, trying to be cute, tells Elena what Vicki thought attacked her. Stefan stiffens at hearing the V-word. He keeps his cool under control, but you know he’s going to have to take care of it, vampire style. I’m interested to know how that’s going to go because squirrel blood is packing much power these days. Stefan better snap out of his "holier than thou" attitude. Damon's not messing around inFell’s Church Mystic Falls.
Neither is Matt, who brings up Stefan to Elena. In a "yeah, right" moment, Elena promises Matt that "the last thing I want to do is hurt you." I'm just going to go out with the new guy, who is sexier, more mysterious, and all around an upgrade from you. But, I won't flaunt it in your face, pinkie swear!
Plot A is all about Stefan keeping Damon in check. Plot B of the episode comes in the form of Mr. Tanner at Jeremy’s “parent” meeting. (man, these Gilbert kids cannot get a break). He tells Aunt Jenna she's doing a bang up job of raising her charges. By "bang up", I mean she's doing a horrible job, what sort of moronic judge lets a college lass care for her teenage niece and nephew, and a potato could be more responsible for Jeremy. Mr. Tanner's riding his asshat train all the way! He even goes as far as calling Jenna "the mother's kid sister" and suggesting Aunt Jenna should pass Elena and Jeremy off to someone else because she can't even see the signs that Jeremy's using drugs. Which makes me think that only leaves the state, since Aunt Jenna would seem like a last choice anyway. As Elena puts it later in the episode, Aunt Jenna's just been "Tannered". She was Tannered hard, to be honest.
Matt's having a better day, right? He was, up until Vicki turned bat-shit crazy and attacked him. He runs off to find a nurse and a needle big enough to sedate his sis. Stefan comes barreling into Vicki's hospital room. Knowing time is of the essence, but that it'll be a couple minutes before Matt finds a nurse, Stefan throws Vicki on the bed, leans in really close, and starts whispering sweet nothings into her ear. Y'know typical stuff: "It was an animal that attacked you. You blacked out and that's all you remember." Wash and repeat.
Stefan stops his dazzling/glamouring/hypno-whatzit and gets out of the room seconds before Matt returns to find Vicki sleeping peacefully in her bed. Sensing something's wrong and not looking a gift horse in the mouth, Matt follows shadowy Stefan, who just wants to get home and have his mid-day bird, for Pete's sakes! Naturally, Stefan ducks into the room where blood donations are going on. Slick. He dives out a window just as Matt comes in, leaving him to scratch his head.
Our favorite small town psychic, Bonnie, goes ahead and tells her friends what everyone's thinking: The comet brings about the baaaaaad things: blood, and carnage, and a cesspool of paranormal activity. Yeah, like there's something else the comet that's playing a major part in the day's episode could be bringing with it. Caroline's still not a bitch, which means one of two things. She is secretly psychotic and will lose her mind any second now; or, something really baaaaaad is going to happen to her. Possibly when that Comet of Doom! shoots across the sky.
After Bonnie's only purpose for being in the episode passes, the attention gets shifted back to Elena and her budding relationship with Stefan.
Caroline: "So, you and him totally did it, right?"
Elena: "No, we just talked."
Bonnie: "Yeah, okay, whatever, Snow White."
Elena: "We just talked all night!"
Caroline: "Come on, Elena, we know you. You totally tapped that last night."
Elena: "That's Book!Elena! I'm TV!Elena. There's a difference!"
TV Audience: "No shit!"
But, after much prodding, Elena decides to go jump Stefan's bones. (So much for not wanting to hurt Matt.) Yes, she's known him only--what--a day and she's decided she needs to hit that like it was yesterday. It's all part of Elena's new pro-active lease on life. I'm sure it's going to end wonderfully for the two of them. /sarcasm
I guess Mystic Falls' high school does their parent teacher conferences in the afternoon, because it is still light outside when Jeremy comes home and finds Aunt Jenna in the kitchen. Oh god, this is going to be priceless. Like most adults trying to prove a point, Aunt Jenna tells Jeremy about her wild days. She did pot! She skipped class! She had that back alley abortion nobody talks about! She was cool once, Jeremy! Don't you see? But, she grew out of it and became even more cooler by being stuck with her older sister's two teenage kids! Her life is so wonderful! Only, Jeremy hears it as Aunt Jenna giving her blessing for his drug ways and leaves. Probably to down a whole bottle of Jack Daniels after that. It won't faze me if Aunt Jenna develops a drinking problem herself for not being the responsible guardian she thought she was, and without having the support of a guy to tell her she's doing a great job. I hear Stefan's “uncle”/parol officer, Zach, is free...
Back at the hospital, Stefan's mind freak...actually works. Huh, squirrel's blood must be more potent than previously thought. Vicki's thinking it was an animal that attacked her, Matt's all suspicious, and Jeremy's filling in the stalking quota by showing up again at the hospital. Aww, Matt's so sweet and leaves the two of them to talk. It's because he doesn't realize that Vicki and Jeremy aren't just friends and are actually what he hopes Elena and him will be some day. Alone, Vicki's crazy goes up a level and she explains to Jeremy she can't afford everyone finding out they had sex. Many times. Now would be the moment Aunt Jenna comes in to play the parental figure, telling Jeremy a girl who wants to keep their relationship a secret is not worth it. It means she does not like you. However, Vicki's Ice Queen 'tude changes when Jeremy reveals he was the one who carried her out of the woods. 'Cause every girl wants saving deep down inside.
Elena arrives at the Salvatore Shack to find it eerily creepy. Following Chapter 3 of Horror Movie Cliches and the Writers Who Insist on Using Them, Elena explores the house. Stuff bangs, wind blows, the house stays creepy, door slams open, and...
Elena: "Eek! The ominous black crow!"
Oh...and Damon...doing his best "Stefan showing up suddenly" impression. Only, when Stefan does it, D-bag, he doesn't have that hungry look in his eyes.
Once we come back from the commercial--you know, so all the tweens can catch their breathes and twitter, "OMG, DAMON WAS IN THE HOUSE!!!! BOO!!!--Elena apologies for barging in. Trust me, E., it was no intrusion. Damon, who has grown his hair out in the same day Stefan's lost weight, introduces himself as Stefan's brother. None of this "I'm a college student just visiting" crap. Nope, straight to thelove triangle point.
Elena: "Is Stefan in? I'm totes ready to give myself to him; even though we just met yesterday."
Damon: "You just missed him. He's off to the hospital to dazzle/glamour/mind freak your friend Vicki into not revealing that I'm a vampire, which would coincidentally expose Stefan as one too."
Elena: "Huh?"
Damon: "Here, have a cookie."
Damon shows Elena the pimpin' back to the 19th century living room. It isn't long before he brings up Katherine and calls it Stefan's "recent" break-up. He explains it was really hard on him, and how he, Damon, had nothing to do with it, I'm sure, why are you even asking?
Damon: “I didn't want to ruin my younger brother's life and I don't now. I want you two to be happy, that's why I'm bringing up that Stefan's still devastated over the whole Katherine incident. Did he mention you look like her? Like, a lot, Elena. Too bad your relationship isn't going to work. Because it's a rebound, not because of any other influences. Stop looking at me!”
Elena is not amused. "You say it like every relationship is doomed to end." Well, sweetie, in theory they do.
Ah! Stefan! Move, move, move! They're in the living room and Damon is moving in on Elena. Let's not have a repeat of Katherine, m'kay?
Stefan's on the right page and sends Elena off on her way in a rude, but I'm-just-trying-to-get-you-away-from-my-nutsy-bro-before-he-kills-you stare. Elena gives Stefan that "we totally need to talk, and I'm so over sleeping with you" look as she passes him.
Just Stefan and Damon remain. Rumble in the living room? Nope, just circling around each other, whining and moaning over who is playing what game, and "Leave my girl and this town alone!" type of insults. And...Stefan's morphed into that overprotective vamp we all know and love. Since he's already been invited into the Gilbert house, climbing into Elena's bedroom at night won't be that hard. Score!
Elena, back at home with Aunt Jenna, is still put off by Damon's remark that she is Stefan's rebound. Girl, I don't think it is a problem. Katherine died centuries ago. I'm no expert either, but I believe reincarnation does not count as a rebound. So, stop your whining and go back to being the Elena who's going to smash Matt's heart by not keeping her word about not hurting him from a few hours ago.
Jeremy returns home just then. In Round Two of Let Me Be Your Parent!, Aunt Jenna tries once more to get through to Jeremy. Again, he isn't buying it. With no more words at her disposal, Aunt Jenna throws a piece of fruit at him (no, I'm not kidding). High, Jeremy thinks it’s hilarious, if not a little like he enjoyed it. Fruit kink, anyone?
Even though Stefan did his mind freak on Vicki, she still has a nightmare of one attacking her in the hospital bathroom. Dream Matt can't even get his lazy ass up and help her. Brothers. I would like to point out that the commercials are coming pretty fast for this episode. Annoyingly quick.
The Night of Doom! is upon us with the festival celebrating The Comet of Doom! getting under way. Elena's doing her best to convince herself that she's not ready for a relationship.
Elena: "The timing is all wrong! Reality doesn't want me to be happy because I didn't even pass along my phone number to Stefan! I must be shrouded in mourning for the rest of my life!"
She's telling everyone who will listen, and everyone's rolling their eyes. At least these small town people have brains. Caroline spots the creepy vampire lurking about town (that would be Damon). It's too bad she can't hear the literal music playing over her head: "Here I come/when I better go/I say yes/when I outta say no..." (Honestly, the whole show's literal music selections for its scenes is starting to get on my nerves.) Oh, sweetheart, I'm beginning to worry about you. I'm allowed to since you aren't total biotch yet. Damn it!
Stefan's trying to get over to the festivities, but Zach's cramping his style. Doesn't Zach see Stefan needs to go talk to the girl he loves and tell her he didn't mean to be rude; it's just his brother's a total douchebag, and she must stay away from him. Stefan's allowed to go after he assures Zach that Vicki doesn't remember it was a vampire that attacked her. I...what? Zach's vampire code says Stefan can use his powers--which would feed his need to continue to be all vampy, I would think. Stefan just cannot drink humans, because that's baaaaaad. You've got a new name Zach: it starts with an "H" and rhymes with "crite". (ETA note: On my second watching, I picked up that Zach calls Stefan "Uncle Stefan". I'd go on about how that's a glaring and MAJOR! change from the books, if I wasn't still wrapping my mind around that revelation. You thought the Gilberts were having some family issues...)
Tyler's also not feeling the love. He watches a verbal--and prescription drug--exchange between a freshly released from the hospital Vicki and Jeremy. Finally! Vicki has some sense knocked into her and she tells Tyler off for not visiting her.
Vicki: "You never came to see me! Jeremy did, and he's not old enough to drive yet! Jeremy listens to me, he's nice to me, and he is selling me drugs! I hate you, Tyler!" She storms off.
Tyler: is going to make Jeremy pay.
Me: shaking my head "I'm so glad I'm not in high school anymore."
Speaking of high school, how's that pro-activeness tantrum going, Elena? Oh, how cute, Matt lights Elena's candle for watching The Comet of Doom! and...Elena turns around to light...Stefan's candle. Oh, thank god! My room would have been trashed if it was Damon's. No, I am not overreacting. Damon had a habit of showing up in the novels when it should have been Stefan there. Wait...this series isn't follow most of the book rules. Why was I so worried? As you were...
Matt lights Elena's candle; she, in return, lights Stefan's, and is caught in the middle of an awkward game of Monkey in the Middle between the two guys vying for her. It's awkward!
Elena: "Oh, noes, I hate love triangles!"
Matt: "Really? I would think you be all for them."
Elena: "Not all moody, brunette girls like them! God!"
She walks away from the situation. Stefan's keeping up with his overprotectiveness, so he follows her. Awww.
Stefan has this moment of explaining to Elena that Bonnie's analysis that it's a Comet of Doom! is wrong. It means something completely different! "You know that comet's been traveling for thousands of years in space all alone...trapped on a path it can't escape. Once every 145 years it gets to come home." Translation: "This comet symbolizes our love, Elena! Don't you see?! It's all for you!"
The sweet, romantic moment (yes, I'm saying it was romantic. Shut up! I'm a sucker for metaphors.) is ruined with Stefan apologizing for his brother. Elena throws the apology back in his face, telling him he seems to have a need to atone for things. (You have no idea, Elena, dear.) Continuing to kill the relationship before it even begins, Elena brings up the K-word. "That's a long time ago", says Stefan. The last time the Comet of Doom! came around, if you want to do the math. I don't think Stefan's been saving himself for over 200 years because he loved Katherine so much. That would be really lame, and highly unbelievable, no matter what he says. cough, Edward, cough.
I'm not really miffed by Elena's need to stop her relationship with Stefan in its tracks. Unlike in the books, Elena is dealing with the recent deaths of her parents. That's going to effect her, obviously, into a whole guilt issue that she can't be happy. Also, it's a proven fact you can't show love on the screen. Some director–I forget who--said that in a film-making documentary I saw in my senior year Film Studies class. "You can show people falling in love and falling out of it; but once you get them in love, there is no story to tell." If we're going to keep this VD locomotive chugging along, we need to keep the lovers apart, understand?
Elena continues to pull a full 180 with her feelings towards Stefan by running over how much in common both she and Stefan have. Smooth, Elena. We are mercifully saved and leave to see how Vicki's holding up. She'd be fine if she didn't stop to speak to Damon--of course he shows up, we are following the chapters of Horror Moive Cliches and the Writers Who Insist on Using Them.
Vicki: "I totally know you, don't I?"
Damon replies with, "Well, that's unfortunate" beneath his delivish smile.
Oh, Vick, it'll come to you. And it does, in the bathroom, a minute later, when Damon attacks her. Heeeeeere's, The Comet of Doom!
While Vicki's being attacked in the bathroom, Tyler takes it as the designed moment to go up to Jeremy and accuse him of stalking his girlfriend. The Littlest Gilbert retaliates by informing Tyler that he and Vicki had sex, lots and lots of it, and are going to keep having sex because their love rules and Tyler drools. I'm missing the time periods when we settled our disputes by a having duel or engaging in fisticuffs. It was way more efficient back then; especially when the girl you are arguing over is having her blood sucked out in the bathroom a few feet away.
Having just stamped all over Stefan's heart, Elena continues to break balls by being tougher than Aunt Jenna and telling Jeremy to stop dealing drugs or he's going to be sent to rehab. Again, what is the point of Aunt J. if Elena's being the adult for both of them? Oh, the teenage drama!
Matt realizes Vicki's been missing for some time. Thanks for joining us, Matt. You’re about as reliable as your dream self! Naturally, the first person Matt runs into in his search for his sister is Stefan. It's the first time they've been eye to eye after Matt chased Stefan through the hospital, after Stefan preformed Mystical Memory Manipulation on Vicki. Matt does bring up seeing Stefan at the hospital; to which Stefan replies he was there visiting someone. Way to cover, Stefan. Luckily, before Matt can press the issue any farther, Stefan overhears Vicki being attacked, chagrinning his chagrin, and he goes off to find herand get back on Matt's good side.
Being a badass, Damon is dangling Vicki off the edge of roof. At the same time, he's metaphorically dangling Stefan's chance at freedom. (Like I said, metaphors get me every time.) It's Round Three of the Alpha Vampire Olympics! Damon showcases he is still stronger by wiping Vicki free of Stefan's not-so-strong-after-all mind control. Vicki starts screaming at the top of her lungs that it was a vampire that attacked her. Not just any vampire, but lo! it was Stefan. Things aren't boding too well for our lovable vegitarian. Stefan is left with the choice of giving into his urges--and Damon--or kill Vicki to protect his secret.
And this is where Stefan shifts into a more deeper character I was not expecting to find in a CW show. You would think he'd kill Vicki, not for himself, but for Elena. Love concures all type of thing. But, he doesn't. Instead, Stefan gives this eloquent speech to Damon--translated fully 'cause it is so awesome:
"Why? So I'll feed? So I'll kill? So I'll remember what it's like to be brothers again? You know what, let her go. Let her tell everyone that vampires have returned to Mystic Falls. Let them chain me up. Let them drive a stake through my heart. Because at least I'll be free of you."
Me: (when it's all said) :O
Oh, snap! Yes, Stefan would rather give up being with Elena to be rid of his older brother. I-I-I I think I'm going to die of shock. You mean, this show isn't going to be watered down to only be about eternal love? Stefan cares about something stronger than love and that love isn't going to make him do incredibly stupid things. I...I could work with this.
Damon's also non-too pleased at realizing Stefan just won that round. He looks like he's going to level the place. Now that Stefan's taken away the one thing he believed he had an influence over, Damon is forced to undazzle Vicki. True to Vicki, once she's out from Damon's control and back to thinking it was an animal attack, she stumbles off, saying it’s all good because "I took some pills, man. I'm good." in the same way a strung out hippie would sound.
That part of his plan soured, Damon is left to do the one thing he knows how to do: pretend like he's still ahead of the game.
Damon: "Whateva, I don't need her. I got other plans for you, bro! Bigger plans! They're BIG, I say! HUGE!"
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out. I thought it was blatanly clear Damon was here for Elena. Given Damon's knowning smile and Stefan's confused look, clearly that's not the case. Anyway, that love triangle--above being played out--couldn't sustain a television series for five seasons. Which could mean that Damon's around for another reason: He's here to make Stefan's life hell. (Watch, it'll be something so lame, like Stefan broke his Journey CD 20 years ago and Damon's holding a grudge over that.) Considering I blogged a rant about making vampires evil again, I'm inches away from thinking I’m the psychic. Move out of the way, Bonnie! You mean, there's actually going to be a vampire on pop culture TV that's going to be nasty and evil and not give a fuck about who he destroys in the process of getting what he wants--and it's not for love?! He won't be out in the woods throwing back rabbits like whiskey shots. He is going to take out the small town's seemingly endless supply of Red Shirts? Whew! Damon, representing the asshole vampires! Even so, you aren't as hot as your younger brother...and that's saying something since I was a Boone girl. I bawled my eyes out when he died, no lie.
Back on track:
Whatever Damon's plans are, it involves staying around and he leaves X-plans at a mystery. We are spreading this thin plot out over 22 episodes, after all. There has to be more up Damon's sleeves, considering the VD producers didn't take my suggestion of dragging out the Damon appearing storyline for a little while.
Wow, Comet of Doom!, you sort of lived up to your reputation. Then, you had to go and lose it by Vicki telling Matt it was Stefan who found her wandering around, making Matt forgive him for being shady at the hospital. (Caroline's commentary of Vicki, "Ever notice how the druggies are the biggest attention whores?", made me snort Coke all over my laptop. Takes one to know one, honey.)
Oh, wait, Comet of Doom!, you're bringing it back with Bonnie getting a psychic reading off of Stefan when she hands him Elena's cellphone number. "What happened to you?", she asks, all wide-eyed and frightened. Bonnie books it out of there without an explanation.
Stefan: "Great, now I've got to take care of Elena's friend. That's not going to be a good foundation for our relationship."
Elena arrives home, where Aunt Jenna's ransacking Jeremy's room. The pressures of taking care of two kids roughly her same age, who somehow don't want to listen to her, has broken Aunt Jenna. The scene's depressing and funny with going as far as having Jenna play Drug Paraphernalia Hunt as if it's Easter Morning. Crazed Aunt Jenna is on a mission to find those drugs! I hate to think how she's going to dispose of them; specially once she finds Jeremy's bong. Playing the adult role once again, Elena tries to assure Aunt Jenna she isn't screwing up. It becomes A Very Special Vampire Diaries episode with Aunt Jenna's response. "Yes, I am. And you know why? It's because I'm not her." The "her" is Elena and Jeremy's mother. Oh god, it's a PSA up in Jeremy's room. Elena recognizes it as Aunt Jenna's fear...and has her own break through along the way.
Meanwhile, at The Grove, The Comet of Doom! strikes again. Damon's voodoo reversal works a little too well on Vicki, and she's back in the arms of Tyler. Jeremy's going to need his drug stash when he gets home. It could be a nice bonding moment for him and Aunt Jenna. Love isn't being kind to Caroline either when she goes out to her car...and is confronted by "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee" Damon.
Caroline: "Wow! Elena's right, guys magically showing up behind us is a turn-on!"
There's no fog around, so I'm assuming Damon wants her for something else...
Going back to seizing the day, Elena marches herself up to Stefan's door. Since Damon's busy with...other things...Stefan is there to open the door and brings in the background music that's all too literal for the scene.
Elena: "Let's start over, and nothing says 'starting over' like watching The Comet of Doom! sail over the sky."
While they wait, Elena explains to Stefan she's giving up her journal dependency; as well as the location of said diary. Hopefully, that won't come back and bite her in the ass. She's tired of writing down what she should do, and is actually going to do it. Aaaaand, we are back to go-getter Elena. As I predicted earlier, Elena is feeling guilty about wanting to be happy. "I'm scared that if I let myself be happy for even one moment, that the world's going to come crashing down, and I don't know if I can survive that." (Foreshadowing, me thinks, for when Elena learns Stefan's a blood-sucker.) Stefan, too, is afraid of the same thing. Inspired, he tells Elena what he'd write in his journal*.
*We don't actually see Stefan write in a journal this episode. I guess there was some self discovery from pilot to here that the writers had and they realized how emo-lame it was having Stefan keep adiary journal. Bravo!
Boiling it down, Stefan would write about him realizing his reality is right there, with Elena. He's poetically echoing Elena’s struggle to end their relationship because it wasn't a part of her reality. Everything is all full circle with them! It's so adorable! My eyes are glazing over! Is that Comet of Doom! here yet?
And then, in an epic moment of I See What You Did There, Elena and Stefan finally have their first kiss right as the comet is flying over their heads. Admittedly, the CW is too cheap to spring for a cheap stock footage of Haley's Comet or the CGI effect to show it's happening. Nevertheless, I imagine the comet was shooting over Mystic Falls right about then. (Metaphors, ahoy!)
So, that was the best The Comet of Doom! could bring? Vicki gets released from the hospital, only to be a pawn in Stefan and Damon's brother issues, but is saved by Stefan's righteous speech; Aunt Jenna gets the approval from her niece that she's doing a good job and doesn't need to act like her older sister; and our two star-struck lovers stop dicking around and make things official. That's the bad things that were going to happen? And don't tell me that Caroline hooking up with Damon is so terrible...Oh.
Bonnie's Comet of Doom! prediction comes riding in on the tail of the meteoroid and the tail end of the show when Damon bites Caroline. Hard. On her thigh. It's really kinky and almost fell off my bed from it. I cannot believe the CW approved a shot like that. Showing a steamy sex scenes I can see them showing, but vampire necking is so much more intimate. We'll be lucky if we get the beginnings of a sex scene in Breaking Dawn before it conveniently fades to black and a star shoots across the sky with "Sexual Innuendo" screaming behind it, let alone a close-up of vampire fangs digging into skin. Dare I say, the Damon-Caroline moment was bordering True Blood level. A PG-13 rating, but still reminiscent of when Bill bit Sookie in the throes of their love making for the first time.
Okay, Vampire Diaries, you've hooked me for another episode. However, with the teaser showing a hot and sexy Stefan rocking football gear and Elena looking to get it on with Stefanwhich turns out to be a dream, it's very easy for the awesomeness to fall off the show. Do. Not. Fuck. It. Up. I mean it; I'm very sensitive about vampires right now.
Episode 3: "Friday Night Bites"
5. Stop giving vampires mystic powers! I don't want to read another vampire who can see the future, control elements, heal people, hear the inner most thoughts of the girl their obsessed with. I know, I know, Dracula controlled some elements and he was besties with wolves and other lower level animals. That's fine because he didn't flaunt it. I'm so sick of vampires being "one with the Earth". They aren't suppose to be. Their the world's rejects--forced to live on the plane of existence by feeding off of life itself. That's enough for me. Quick reflexes, superhuman hearing, and impressive strength are okay. Just knock it off with the psychic abilities, please.
Vampire Academy wasn't that bad. Richelle Mead got me at the "forbidden love" nonsense. Don't look at me like that! It’s not between a mortal and vampire. I'm sorry, but nothing beats two people from not being together because their love would jeopardize their sacred duty of protecting her best friend. Nothing! I'm such a loser...
Also-also: The Vampire Diaries pilot < last night's episode. I'm still wavering between continual watching the show; and yet, if VD keeps up its slow rise of getting better, it might become a not-so guilty pleasure of mine. Lots of stuff went down, including character reversals, baaaaaad vampire shenanigans, and a renewed hope that producers actually know what their doing with the changes they've made.
Previous Episode
The episode begins with a section from the nifty guide, Horror Movie Cliches and the Writers Who Insist on Using Them: You know what's fun? Let's go set up a tent in the same woods where people are being attacked. Honey, what a wonderful idea! Though, I could do without the fog machine. I'm going to wear my new red shirt, isn't it cute on me? Yes, our dim-witted couple are eaten in a manner of minutes by Damon.
Seriously, Stefan, stop dreaming/voice-overing about how you and Elena complete each other and keep a tighter hold on Damon. For all we know, those aren't the only two people he eats tonight. Okay, afraid to admit it, but here I go: Poor Man's Robert Pattinson is growing on me. Like, he's really hot. Duh, I know, I'm complaining about the cliche above and I've fallen into the most overused one of all--vampires are sexy, yum! Whatever. The CW knows how to cast their leading men. Also, I think Paul Wesley lost some weight between the pilot and the actual start of filming the season. It might just be my imagine, but he seemed skinnier in this episode. /fangirl moment
Getting in a quick journal write down before school, Elena waxes that she's going to carpe diem today like her book self. I'm giving it until the second commercial break before she angst spews all over the place. Aww, Aunt Jenna's trying to be the responsible adult. My prediction hat is still on and it's telling me Jeremy's parent meeting isn't going to go all that well.
In History, Elena and Stefan make googly eyes and Mr. Tanner is still a jerk. The second mention of the upcoming and nameless comet appears. It's going to be important later down the episode road, aside from it being in the title.
Wuthering Heights makes its obligated cameo as Stefan loans Elena his first edition copy of it to her. I wish I was making it up and I wish I knew what point the scene was trying to make, other than me rolling my eyes and muttering, "Vampires and fucking Emily Bronte." Bonnie's Druid card has been revoked. Druids don't sound as cool as "single witch chicks" to Bonnie's Grams. I'm on change overload from last week's episode, I don't care anymore.
Rumble in the schoolyard! Jeremy attempts to play tough guy with Tyler about Vicki. See, Jeremy goes and visits Vicki before school. He braids her hair, whines about not having any parents, takes hits off of her morphine drip, and steals her Jell-o cups, all while she's asleep. Tyler...not so much. Jeremy calling him out on his shit is enduring--even when he threatens Tyler's life. I felt like giving J-boy a hug, because we all know where it's going to lead. Vicki's going to go right back to Tyler. We girls are so predictable.
In sly moves of his own, Stefan listens in on Elena and Matt's own conversation about Vicki. Matt, trying to be cute, tells Elena what Vicki thought attacked her. Stefan stiffens at hearing the V-word. He keeps his cool under control, but you know he’s going to have to take care of it, vampire style. I’m interested to know how that’s going to go because squirrel blood is packing much power these days. Stefan better snap out of his "holier than thou" attitude. Damon's not messing around in
Neither is Matt, who brings up Stefan to Elena. In a "yeah, right" moment, Elena promises Matt that "the last thing I want to do is hurt you." I'm just going to go out with the new guy, who is sexier, more mysterious, and all around an upgrade from you. But, I won't flaunt it in your face, pinkie swear!
Plot A is all about Stefan keeping Damon in check. Plot B of the episode comes in the form of Mr. Tanner at Jeremy’s “parent” meeting. (man, these Gilbert kids cannot get a break). He tells Aunt Jenna she's doing a bang up job of raising her charges. By "bang up", I mean she's doing a horrible job, what sort of moronic judge lets a college lass care for her teenage niece and nephew, and a potato could be more responsible for Jeremy. Mr. Tanner's riding his asshat train all the way! He even goes as far as calling Jenna "the mother's kid sister" and suggesting Aunt Jenna should pass Elena and Jeremy off to someone else because she can't even see the signs that Jeremy's using drugs. Which makes me think that only leaves the state, since Aunt Jenna would seem like a last choice anyway. As Elena puts it later in the episode, Aunt Jenna's just been "Tannered". She was Tannered hard, to be honest.
Matt's having a better day, right? He was, up until Vicki turned bat-shit crazy and attacked him. He runs off to find a nurse and a needle big enough to sedate his sis. Stefan comes barreling into Vicki's hospital room. Knowing time is of the essence, but that it'll be a couple minutes before Matt finds a nurse, Stefan throws Vicki on the bed, leans in really close, and starts whispering sweet nothings into her ear. Y'know typical stuff: "It was an animal that attacked you. You blacked out and that's all you remember." Wash and repeat.
Stefan stops his dazzling/glamouring/hypno-whatzit and gets out of the room seconds before Matt returns to find Vicki sleeping peacefully in her bed. Sensing something's wrong and not looking a gift horse in the mouth, Matt follows shadowy Stefan, who just wants to get home and have his mid-day bird, for Pete's sakes! Naturally, Stefan ducks into the room where blood donations are going on. Slick. He dives out a window just as Matt comes in, leaving him to scratch his head.
Our favorite small town psychic, Bonnie, goes ahead and tells her friends what everyone's thinking: The comet brings about the baaaaaad things: blood, and carnage, and a cesspool of paranormal activity. Yeah, like there's something else the comet that's playing a major part in the day's episode could be bringing with it. Caroline's still not a bitch, which means one of two things. She is secretly psychotic and will lose her mind any second now; or, something really baaaaaad is going to happen to her. Possibly when that Comet of Doom! shoots across the sky.
After Bonnie's only purpose for being in the episode passes, the attention gets shifted back to Elena and her budding relationship with Stefan.
Caroline: "So, you and him totally did it, right?"
Elena: "No, we just talked."
Bonnie: "Yeah, okay, whatever, Snow White."
Elena: "We just talked all night!"
Caroline: "Come on, Elena, we know you. You totally tapped that last night."
Elena: "That's Book!Elena! I'm TV!Elena. There's a difference!"
TV Audience: "No shit!"
But, after much prodding, Elena decides to go jump Stefan's bones. (So much for not wanting to hurt Matt.) Yes, she's known him only--what--a day and she's decided she needs to hit that like it was yesterday. It's all part of Elena's new pro-active lease on life. I'm sure it's going to end wonderfully for the two of them. /sarcasm
I guess Mystic Falls' high school does their parent teacher conferences in the afternoon, because it is still light outside when Jeremy comes home and finds Aunt Jenna in the kitchen. Oh god, this is going to be priceless. Like most adults trying to prove a point, Aunt Jenna tells Jeremy about her wild days. She did pot! She skipped class! She had that back alley abortion nobody talks about! She was cool once, Jeremy! Don't you see? But, she grew out of it and became even more cooler by being stuck with her older sister's two teenage kids! Her life is so wonderful! Only, Jeremy hears it as Aunt Jenna giving her blessing for his drug ways and leaves. Probably to down a whole bottle of Jack Daniels after that. It won't faze me if Aunt Jenna develops a drinking problem herself for not being the responsible guardian she thought she was, and without having the support of a guy to tell her she's doing a great job. I hear Stefan's “uncle”/parol officer, Zach, is free...
Back at the hospital, Stefan's mind freak...actually works. Huh, squirrel's blood must be more potent than previously thought. Vicki's thinking it was an animal that attacked her, Matt's all suspicious, and Jeremy's filling in the stalking quota by showing up again at the hospital. Aww, Matt's so sweet and leaves the two of them to talk. It's because he doesn't realize that Vicki and Jeremy aren't just friends and are actually what he hopes Elena and him will be some day. Alone, Vicki's crazy goes up a level and she explains to Jeremy she can't afford everyone finding out they had sex. Many times. Now would be the moment Aunt Jenna comes in to play the parental figure, telling Jeremy a girl who wants to keep their relationship a secret is not worth it. It means she does not like you. However, Vicki's Ice Queen 'tude changes when Jeremy reveals he was the one who carried her out of the woods. 'Cause every girl wants saving deep down inside.
Elena arrives at the Salvatore Shack to find it eerily creepy. Following Chapter 3 of Horror Movie Cliches and the Writers Who Insist on Using Them, Elena explores the house. Stuff bangs, wind blows, the house stays creepy, door slams open, and...
Elena: "Eek! The ominous black crow!"
Oh...and Damon...doing his best "Stefan showing up suddenly" impression. Only, when Stefan does it, D-bag, he doesn't have that hungry look in his eyes.
Once we come back from the commercial--you know, so all the tweens can catch their breathes and twitter, "OMG, DAMON WAS IN THE HOUSE!!!! BOO!!!--Elena apologies for barging in. Trust me, E., it was no intrusion. Damon, who has grown his hair out in the same day Stefan's lost weight, introduces himself as Stefan's brother. None of this "I'm a college student just visiting" crap. Nope, straight to the
Elena: "Is Stefan in? I'm totes ready to give myself to him; even though we just met yesterday."
Damon: "You just missed him. He's off to the hospital to dazzle/glamour/mind freak your friend Vicki into not revealing that I'm a vampire, which would coincidentally expose Stefan as one too."
Elena: "Huh?"
Damon: "Here, have a cookie."
Damon shows Elena the pimpin' back to the 19th century living room. It isn't long before he brings up Katherine and calls it Stefan's "recent" break-up. He explains it was really hard on him, and how he, Damon, had nothing to do with it, I'm sure, why are you even asking?
Damon: “I didn't want to ruin my younger brother's life and I don't now. I want you two to be happy, that's why I'm bringing up that Stefan's still devastated over the whole Katherine incident. Did he mention you look like her? Like, a lot, Elena. Too bad your relationship isn't going to work. Because it's a rebound, not because of any other influences. Stop looking at me!”
Elena is not amused. "You say it like every relationship is doomed to end." Well, sweetie, in theory they do.
Ah! Stefan! Move, move, move! They're in the living room and Damon is moving in on Elena. Let's not have a repeat of Katherine, m'kay?
Stefan's on the right page and sends Elena off on her way in a rude, but I'm-just-trying-to-get-you-away-from-my-nutsy-bro-before-he-kills-you stare. Elena gives Stefan that "we totally need to talk, and I'm so over sleeping with you" look as she passes him.
Just Stefan and Damon remain. Rumble in the living room? Nope, just circling around each other, whining and moaning over who is playing what game, and "Leave my girl and this town alone!" type of insults. And...Stefan's morphed into that overprotective vamp we all know and love. Since he's already been invited into the Gilbert house, climbing into Elena's bedroom at night won't be that hard. Score!
Elena, back at home with Aunt Jenna, is still put off by Damon's remark that she is Stefan's rebound. Girl, I don't think it is a problem. Katherine died centuries ago. I'm no expert either, but I believe reincarnation does not count as a rebound. So, stop your whining and go back to being the Elena who's going to smash Matt's heart by not keeping her word about not hurting him from a few hours ago.
Jeremy returns home just then. In Round Two of Let Me Be Your Parent!, Aunt Jenna tries once more to get through to Jeremy. Again, he isn't buying it. With no more words at her disposal, Aunt Jenna throws a piece of fruit at him (no, I'm not kidding). High, Jeremy thinks it’s hilarious, if not a little like he enjoyed it. Fruit kink, anyone?
Even though Stefan did his mind freak on Vicki, she still has a nightmare of one attacking her in the hospital bathroom. Dream Matt can't even get his lazy ass up and help her. Brothers. I would like to point out that the commercials are coming pretty fast for this episode. Annoyingly quick.
The Night of Doom! is upon us with the festival celebrating The Comet of Doom! getting under way. Elena's doing her best to convince herself that she's not ready for a relationship.
Elena: "The timing is all wrong! Reality doesn't want me to be happy because I didn't even pass along my phone number to Stefan! I must be shrouded in mourning for the rest of my life!"
She's telling everyone who will listen, and everyone's rolling their eyes. At least these small town people have brains. Caroline spots the creepy vampire lurking about town (that would be Damon). It's too bad she can't hear the literal music playing over her head: "Here I come/when I better go/I say yes/when I outta say no..." (Honestly, the whole show's literal music selections for its scenes is starting to get on my nerves.) Oh, sweetheart, I'm beginning to worry about you. I'm allowed to since you aren't total biotch yet. Damn it!
Stefan's trying to get over to the festivities, but Zach's cramping his style. Doesn't Zach see Stefan needs to go talk to the girl he loves and tell her he didn't mean to be rude; it's just his brother's a total douchebag, and she must stay away from him. Stefan's allowed to go after he assures Zach that Vicki doesn't remember it was a vampire that attacked her. I...what? Zach's vampire code says Stefan can use his powers--which would feed his need to continue to be all vampy, I would think. Stefan just cannot drink humans, because that's baaaaaad. You've got a new name Zach: it starts with an "H" and rhymes with "crite". (ETA note: On my second watching, I picked up that Zach calls Stefan "Uncle Stefan". I'd go on about how that's a glaring and MAJOR! change from the books, if I wasn't still wrapping my mind around that revelation. You thought the Gilberts were having some family issues...)
Tyler's also not feeling the love. He watches a verbal--and prescription drug--exchange between a freshly released from the hospital Vicki and Jeremy. Finally! Vicki has some sense knocked into her and she tells Tyler off for not visiting her.
Vicki: "You never came to see me! Jeremy did, and he's not old enough to drive yet! Jeremy listens to me, he's nice to me, and he is selling me drugs! I hate you, Tyler!" She storms off.
Tyler: is going to make Jeremy pay.
Me: shaking my head "I'm so glad I'm not in high school anymore."
Speaking of high school, how's that pro-activeness tantrum going, Elena? Oh, how cute, Matt lights Elena's candle for watching The Comet of Doom! and...Elena turns around to light...Stefan's candle. Oh, thank god! My room would have been trashed if it was Damon's. No, I am not overreacting. Damon had a habit of showing up in the novels when it should have been Stefan there. Wait...this series isn't follow most of the book rules. Why was I so worried? As you were...
Matt lights Elena's candle; she, in return, lights Stefan's, and is caught in the middle of an awkward game of Monkey in the Middle between the two guys vying for her. It's awkward!
Elena: "Oh, noes, I hate love triangles!"
Matt: "Really? I would think you be all for them."
Elena: "Not all moody, brunette girls like them! God!"
She walks away from the situation. Stefan's keeping up with his overprotectiveness, so he follows her. Awww.
Stefan has this moment of explaining to Elena that Bonnie's analysis that it's a Comet of Doom! is wrong. It means something completely different! "You know that comet's been traveling for thousands of years in space all alone...trapped on a path it can't escape. Once every 145 years it gets to come home." Translation: "This comet symbolizes our love, Elena! Don't you see?! It's all for you!"
The sweet, romantic moment (yes, I'm saying it was romantic. Shut up! I'm a sucker for metaphors.) is ruined with Stefan apologizing for his brother. Elena throws the apology back in his face, telling him he seems to have a need to atone for things. (You have no idea, Elena, dear.) Continuing to kill the relationship before it even begins, Elena brings up the K-word. "That's a long time ago", says Stefan. The last time the Comet of Doom! came around, if you want to do the math. I don't think Stefan's been saving himself for over 200 years because he loved Katherine so much. That would be really lame, and highly unbelievable, no matter what he says. cough, Edward, cough.
I'm not really miffed by Elena's need to stop her relationship with Stefan in its tracks. Unlike in the books, Elena is dealing with the recent deaths of her parents. That's going to effect her, obviously, into a whole guilt issue that she can't be happy. Also, it's a proven fact you can't show love on the screen. Some director–I forget who--said that in a film-making documentary I saw in my senior year Film Studies class. "You can show people falling in love and falling out of it; but once you get them in love, there is no story to tell." If we're going to keep this VD locomotive chugging along, we need to keep the lovers apart, understand?
Elena continues to pull a full 180 with her feelings towards Stefan by running over how much in common both she and Stefan have. Smooth, Elena. We are mercifully saved and leave to see how Vicki's holding up. She'd be fine if she didn't stop to speak to Damon--of course he shows up, we are following the chapters of Horror Moive Cliches and the Writers Who Insist on Using Them.
Vicki: "I totally know you, don't I?"
Damon replies with, "Well, that's unfortunate" beneath his delivish smile.
Oh, Vick, it'll come to you. And it does, in the bathroom, a minute later, when Damon attacks her. Heeeeeere's, The Comet of Doom!
While Vicki's being attacked in the bathroom, Tyler takes it as the designed moment to go up to Jeremy and accuse him of stalking his girlfriend. The Littlest Gilbert retaliates by informing Tyler that he and Vicki had sex, lots and lots of it, and are going to keep having sex because their love rules and Tyler drools. I'm missing the time periods when we settled our disputes by a having duel or engaging in fisticuffs. It was way more efficient back then; especially when the girl you are arguing over is having her blood sucked out in the bathroom a few feet away.
Having just stamped all over Stefan's heart, Elena continues to break balls by being tougher than Aunt Jenna and telling Jeremy to stop dealing drugs or he's going to be sent to rehab. Again, what is the point of Aunt J. if Elena's being the adult for both of them? Oh, the teenage drama!
Matt realizes Vicki's been missing for some time. Thanks for joining us, Matt. You’re about as reliable as your dream self! Naturally, the first person Matt runs into in his search for his sister is Stefan. It's the first time they've been eye to eye after Matt chased Stefan through the hospital, after Stefan preformed Mystical Memory Manipulation on Vicki. Matt does bring up seeing Stefan at the hospital; to which Stefan replies he was there visiting someone. Way to cover, Stefan. Luckily, before Matt can press the issue any farther, Stefan overhears Vicki being attacked, chagrinning his chagrin, and he goes off to find her
Being a badass, Damon is dangling Vicki off the edge of roof. At the same time, he's metaphorically dangling Stefan's chance at freedom. (Like I said, metaphors get me every time.) It's Round Three of the Alpha Vampire Olympics! Damon showcases he is still stronger by wiping Vicki free of Stefan's not-so-strong-after-all mind control. Vicki starts screaming at the top of her lungs that it was a vampire that attacked her. Not just any vampire, but lo! it was Stefan. Things aren't boding too well for our lovable vegitarian. Stefan is left with the choice of giving into his urges--and Damon--or kill Vicki to protect his secret.
And this is where Stefan shifts into a more deeper character I was not expecting to find in a CW show. You would think he'd kill Vicki, not for himself, but for Elena. Love concures all type of thing. But, he doesn't. Instead, Stefan gives this eloquent speech to Damon--translated fully 'cause it is so awesome:
"Why? So I'll feed? So I'll kill? So I'll remember what it's like to be brothers again? You know what, let her go. Let her tell everyone that vampires have returned to Mystic Falls. Let them chain me up. Let them drive a stake through my heart. Because at least I'll be free of you."
Me: (when it's all said) :O
Oh, snap! Yes, Stefan would rather give up being with Elena to be rid of his older brother. I-I-I I think I'm going to die of shock. You mean, this show isn't going to be watered down to only be about eternal love? Stefan cares about something stronger than love and that love isn't going to make him do incredibly stupid things. I...I could work with this.
Damon's also non-too pleased at realizing Stefan just won that round. He looks like he's going to level the place. Now that Stefan's taken away the one thing he believed he had an influence over, Damon is forced to undazzle Vicki. True to Vicki, once she's out from Damon's control and back to thinking it was an animal attack, she stumbles off, saying it’s all good because "I took some pills, man. I'm good." in the same way a strung out hippie would sound.
That part of his plan soured, Damon is left to do the one thing he knows how to do: pretend like he's still ahead of the game.
Damon: "Whateva, I don't need her. I got other plans for you, bro! Bigger plans! They're BIG, I say! HUGE!"
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out. I thought it was blatanly clear Damon was here for Elena. Given Damon's knowning smile and Stefan's confused look, clearly that's not the case. Anyway, that love triangle--above being played out--couldn't sustain a television series for five seasons. Which could mean that Damon's around for another reason: He's here to make Stefan's life hell. (Watch, it'll be something so lame, like Stefan broke his Journey CD 20 years ago and Damon's holding a grudge over that.) Considering I blogged a rant about making vampires evil again, I'm inches away from thinking I’m the psychic. Move out of the way, Bonnie! You mean, there's actually going to be a vampire on pop culture TV that's going to be nasty and evil and not give a fuck about who he destroys in the process of getting what he wants--and it's not for love?! He won't be out in the woods throwing back rabbits like whiskey shots. He is going to take out the small town's seemingly endless supply of Red Shirts? Whew! Damon, representing the asshole vampires! Even so, you aren't as hot as your younger brother...and that's saying something since I was a Boone girl. I bawled my eyes out when he died, no lie.
Back on track:
Whatever Damon's plans are, it involves staying around and he leaves X-plans at a mystery. We are spreading this thin plot out over 22 episodes, after all. There has to be more up Damon's sleeves, considering the VD producers didn't take my suggestion of dragging out the Damon appearing storyline for a little while.
Wow, Comet of Doom!, you sort of lived up to your reputation. Then, you had to go and lose it by Vicki telling Matt it was Stefan who found her wandering around, making Matt forgive him for being shady at the hospital. (Caroline's commentary of Vicki, "Ever notice how the druggies are the biggest attention whores?", made me snort Coke all over my laptop. Takes one to know one, honey.)
Oh, wait, Comet of Doom!, you're bringing it back with Bonnie getting a psychic reading off of Stefan when she hands him Elena's cellphone number. "What happened to you?", she asks, all wide-eyed and frightened. Bonnie books it out of there without an explanation.
Stefan: "Great, now I've got to take care of Elena's friend. That's not going to be a good foundation for our relationship."
Elena arrives home, where Aunt Jenna's ransacking Jeremy's room. The pressures of taking care of two kids roughly her same age, who somehow don't want to listen to her, has broken Aunt Jenna. The scene's depressing and funny with going as far as having Jenna play Drug Paraphernalia Hunt as if it's Easter Morning. Crazed Aunt Jenna is on a mission to find those drugs! I hate to think how she's going to dispose of them; specially once she finds Jeremy's bong. Playing the adult role once again, Elena tries to assure Aunt Jenna she isn't screwing up. It becomes A Very Special Vampire Diaries episode with Aunt Jenna's response. "Yes, I am. And you know why? It's because I'm not her." The "her" is Elena and Jeremy's mother. Oh god, it's a PSA up in Jeremy's room. Elena recognizes it as Aunt Jenna's fear...and has her own break through along the way.
Meanwhile, at The Grove, The Comet of Doom! strikes again. Damon's voodoo reversal works a little too well on Vicki, and she's back in the arms of Tyler. Jeremy's going to need his drug stash when he gets home. It could be a nice bonding moment for him and Aunt Jenna. Love isn't being kind to Caroline either when she goes out to her car...and is confronted by "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee" Damon.
Caroline: "Wow! Elena's right, guys magically showing up behind us is a turn-on!"
There's no fog around, so I'm assuming Damon wants her for something else...
Going back to seizing the day, Elena marches herself up to Stefan's door. Since Damon's busy with...other things...Stefan is there to open the door and brings in the background music that's all too literal for the scene.
Elena: "Let's start over, and nothing says 'starting over' like watching The Comet of Doom! sail over the sky."
While they wait, Elena explains to Stefan she's giving up her journal dependency; as well as the location of said diary. Hopefully, that won't come back and bite her in the ass. She's tired of writing down what she should do, and is actually going to do it. Aaaaand, we are back to go-getter Elena. As I predicted earlier, Elena is feeling guilty about wanting to be happy. "I'm scared that if I let myself be happy for even one moment, that the world's going to come crashing down, and I don't know if I can survive that." (Foreshadowing, me thinks, for when Elena learns Stefan's a blood-sucker.) Stefan, too, is afraid of the same thing. Inspired, he tells Elena what he'd write in his journal*.
*We don't actually see Stefan write in a journal this episode. I guess there was some self discovery from pilot to here that the writers had and they realized how emo-lame it was having Stefan keep a
Boiling it down, Stefan would write about him realizing his reality is right there, with Elena. He's poetically echoing Elena’s struggle to end their relationship because it wasn't a part of her reality. Everything is all full circle with them! It's so adorable! My eyes are glazing over! Is that Comet of Doom! here yet?
And then, in an epic moment of I See What You Did There, Elena and Stefan finally have their first kiss right as the comet is flying over their heads. Admittedly, the CW is too cheap to spring for a cheap stock footage of Haley's Comet or the CGI effect to show it's happening. Nevertheless, I imagine the comet was shooting over Mystic Falls right about then. (Metaphors, ahoy!)
So, that was the best The Comet of Doom! could bring? Vicki gets released from the hospital, only to be a pawn in Stefan and Damon's brother issues, but is saved by Stefan's righteous speech; Aunt Jenna gets the approval from her niece that she's doing a good job and doesn't need to act like her older sister; and our two star-struck lovers stop dicking around and make things official. That's the bad things that were going to happen? And don't tell me that Caroline hooking up with Damon is so terrible...Oh.
Bonnie's Comet of Doom! prediction comes riding in on the tail of the meteoroid and the tail end of the show when Damon bites Caroline. Hard. On her thigh. It's really kinky and almost fell off my bed from it. I cannot believe the CW approved a shot like that. Showing a steamy sex scenes I can see them showing, but vampire necking is so much more intimate. We'll be lucky if we get the beginnings of a sex scene in Breaking Dawn before it conveniently fades to black and a star shoots across the sky with "Sexual Innuendo" screaming behind it, let alone a close-up of vampire fangs digging into skin. Dare I say, the Damon-Caroline moment was bordering True Blood level. A PG-13 rating, but still reminiscent of when Bill bit Sookie in the throes of their love making for the first time.
Okay, Vampire Diaries, you've hooked me for another episode. However, with the teaser showing a hot and sexy Stefan rocking football gear and Elena looking to get it on with Stefan
Episode 3: "Friday Night Bites"
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no subject
Date: 2014-02-15 03:50 pm (UTC)So I just started watching this. I'm not entirely feeling it. The acting is okay, but the dialogue is bad, bad, bad. I might be on another vampire kick, but I'm not fully committed yet.
Thoughts: I agree with the relief of Caroline's not being bitchy. That was a nice surprise and a cool subversion.
I like Aunt J a lot. Even though she's incompetent, I feel for her, struggling to take care of these two kids who are basically her age because there's no one else available. It's frustrating that Elena seems to be raising herself, Aunt J and Jeremy all my herself though--I'm not averse to teens being seen as the mature, responsible one in the family, but it's a bit tired as a trope for this particular kind of story.
I do not care about the two vampires yet at all. I suppose Elena's supposed to be a reincarnation (yeah, I haven't read the books), but she's still a teenager in this incarnation. Is it weird if I say I thought Clara was a more convincing several-incarnations-immortal-girl character? At least so far? Pouring out one's soul after knowing the guy a whole day is just really hard to buy.
I'm weirdly intrigued by Vicky. I don't want her to die, and I understand--even though I don't sympathize with--her struggle to maintain a certain persona by dating the douchebag popular guy, and getting closer to the junkie-enabler-but-sweet guy. I think she's going to either die horribly or be turned. It wouldn't be the first time I've seen the blood=drug addiction metaphor.
SO, question: How do things go from here? I don't need plot points or anything, but some reassurance that the quality will pick up a bit would be nice.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-15 05:20 pm (UTC)I can't remember when it picks up, but I did enjoy Seasons 1 & 2 very much. Yeah, the first couple of episodes are rough. (According to my other recaps, Episode 6 is where it started to pick up for me and I accepted the show for what it was.) Once ~The Originals~ get introduced (Season 3, I believe) (and it becomes all about them), I lost so much interest and didn't finish out Season 4, and have dropped the show.
It may be hard to enjoy the show, though, if you don't care about the male vampires, as it's a CW show, so they pander a lot to the female audience with the male eye candy. But, on the whole, Seasons 1 & 2 had a lot of twist and turns and moved at a pretty rapid pace. If you can eek it out, I'd say stay with it for the first 3 Seasons. After that, you're on your own.